Optimism Freaks Me Out

"OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I threw the fork down and started spitting out spinach, jerking back.
"What is it?! What??" My mom stayed relatively calm, yet surprised.
"It's a bug!!! IT'S A BUUGGGG!!!!!!" Pushing the bowl back hurriedly, I started to... slap my knee and like spaz. I showed my mom where it was. Right there, 2 centimeters long, a greenish-yellow with a few pairs of dark legs and black beady eyes. In. My. Spinach. Zach came over while my mom denied that there was in fact a bug in my greens, saying it was just the stem. He observed it and came to the conclusion that it was in fact a bug. "Aaaahh!!!!" This was gross. I was gross. It was gross. Ugh ugh ugh GROSS. No. I started squeezing my knee and slapping it, panicking. "Argh!! Eww!!!" Oh and by the way, these are not your high-pitched, girly screams. These are my normal voice screams with some grossed-out ness put it them. Because I was grossed-out. So was everybody. How would YOU feel if you were eating something and SAW a frickin' BUG in it? A worm. They crawl. Tiny pincers. Little eyes... green... ugh stop it. Luckily it wasn't moving, but the bottom half was squished. Ew. I had probably just eaten some bug guts. Maybe even a bug. UGH I need to stop thinking about that.

That was lunch break. Everything was OK until then. After that, every little twitch or small hole in the ground where I stepped made me shiver. Everything felt like tiny little bug legs. Creepy.... Then I went back to school, not dreading it. Today was actually moderately good, except for the STUPID new schedule. Now, I get out at 5:30 on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. And I have to miss some English classes, and my one musique class, which is awesome actually. UGH. But- I do get to miss sport (gym) on Thursdays. Oh yeah- and I got freaked out by life again today. I had the geographie/histoire test today in French. I had to cram, which sucks. The teacher wasn't there again today. So that meant 2 hours of etude, then my test. That's like... freaky. So I studied those hours. And I memorized it. 700 BC- birth of agriculture, 400 BC- birth of writing, 200 BC, time of the Bible, 1-99 was the debut of Christianity, 52 AD (or BC I don't know...) was the height of Athens, 50 AD or whatever was Cesar's victory at some place, 1452 or 1493 was the "prise de Grenade" and discovery of America, and something something. And Clovis was baptized in 496, and yeah there's more but I forgot. So that was awesome for me, to have that etude. I was feeling pretty confident.
The test was different than I thought (they almost always are, aren't they?) and I had to leave some places blank. Oh well. But it wasn't that bad. I had to answer 5 questions in French about like the rights and liberty and stuff, which we had been taking notes on but I didn't study for. But I did try. 'Cause leaving it blank is not my style. Then, since the ENP teachers had training activities or whatever today and tomorrow, we didn't have any English classes. So I had etude, then my first FLE lesson. I sat with Jess and Quinn, which was cool. We had talked before in etude about how the school system sucks and all that. I mean, the teachers give you homework to "learn the lesson". Isn't that sort of what the teacher is supposed to do??
The FLE teacher was the same one that gave me the French test. He's nice. I don't think he recognized me, though. I dunno. He's OK at English, but has a heavy accent. We had to get a bunch of stuff. Jess was pretty good; she had enough courage to actually ask questions and stuff. I didn't like the schedule. Like I said, I get out later. And I just... ugh. At the end, I said, "Ugh this sucks!" and Jess said, as she was putting her stuff away, "Well, could be worse," and I immediately thought about what Becca said. But then Jess added, "well, actually not really..."

Lunch was..... well, I already told you. I read some of my USA Hockey Magazine. Then had technologie and Spanish (groan). But I also had "Math Speciales", which was yet ANOTHER math class. I now have 3 math classes: 2 in French. 4 classes if you count my dad occasionally tutoring me in Algebra. Ugh. So I left techno after about 20 minutes and had some trouble finding room L 30. There was L 31, L29 and L32. But then I caught Joey walking outside and he showed me. The teacher was nice. I was also with Quinn and Jess for this class. Both of them had English accents, and I almost felt tempted to use mine, but that'd be... weird. So anyway.
Spanish was... ugh as usual. But- I did have a lot of fun with Jess. We had to write and orally perform a conversation in Spanish. We had like 3 lines, and me a terrible accent. And we couldn't use the paper when we got up. I stumbled a little. And then the teacher added at the end that "Amelia speaks Spanish like she's speaking English; no accent," and I'm just like, "There's sort of a reason..." but of course I didn't say that to her. It's annoying. We got 13/20 (65%= U at Slauson) for that, but that wasn't the lowest score.

It's weird though, 'cause you know how I used to be all worried and stuff? Well, things go OK. Like all the time. I'm starting to actually have some faith in that whole "everything is going to be okay" thing. I don't hate school. It's actually sort of fun with friends. I get lots of exercise walking back and forth from school 4 times a day. And I run sometimes, because I can and want to.

Time for some miscellaneous "news" because I suck at transitions. Someone wrote "Vinclaire is gay with {some person}" and "Hannah is gay and mental problems" on Vinclaire's and someone else's locker. It was terrible- people were laughing at her at recess and stuff. I witnessed that. Man, if that happened at Slauson, Ms. Smith would like.... explode. I would predict at least a 45 minute "don't jump in the stupid can" lecture, possibly for two days. And she wouldn't laugh like ever; glares and frowns. The kind that, when you look at her, you have to put on a "I agree with her- that was really stupid" and a surprised one perhaps. Well, at leas that's what happens with me. Oh, and about band- I've been trying really hard to practice a lot. But with the fact that I'll be getting home at like 5:50 most days, it'll be hard. But I guess I do really love trumpet. And I really want to get on a good marching band.

My dad got to take home the goalie equipment. He said his experience between the crease was sweaty and tiring. The helmet is cool. It's Itech. Supposedly the other goalie from Ann Arbor (French woman) injured her knee, so they need another goalie. And, one of the guys said they were starting a girl's hockey team in Meyrin, where the Levins' apartment was, which is close. So cool.

I keep remembering how my parents and people said this whole thing was worth it. And I bet at the end I'll like "learn important life lessons". Well, I have learned something important. Not necessarily "learned" but "come to realize" that optimism works and is realistic. I'm not going to end this post with some cheesy advice or conclusion or whatever. I haven't got a letter in a while. Or ridden my bike. Or had a cheeseburger. Or played baseball. Or frowned.